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LETTER TO THE ONE THAT GOD HAS CREATED FOR ME
I am wondering at this very minute if you are thinking of me,
if like me, you are wondering what is taking us so long to find each other.
Many times I thought I finally found you
only to be disillusioned by the fact that my wait has not yet ended.
I get up each morning hoping, dreaming, longing to meet you.
I am thinking of how we will meet, would it be as romantic as the ones I have seen in movies?
Or is it possible that I have known you all my life
but we have yet to realize that we are meant for each other?
Oh how I wish you were here right now
because you are the only one who has the answers to all my questions.
Sometimes I ask myself if I have ever really known "love".
I do not have the answer to that question either
but I believe that, more often than not,
we will never really know what love is until we find that right person....
and since I have not found you yet, then maybe I do not really know what love is!
You just don't know how often I dream
of finally knowing what it feels like to be in your arms.
Even at this very moment
I am imagining how you will simply sweep me off my feet!
Perhaps I would be drawn to you by your smile, or your eyes,
or maybe even how you manage to make me laugh by your silly little ways!
I don't really know for sure
but I am praying that God will help me recognize you when the right time comes.
I think of all the pain that I have gone through in the past
and of how much I have cried since the day I began my search.
I just wanted you to know that I find my strength in clinging onto my vision of the beautiful life ahead of me ---
the life I shall spend with you.
In my mind and in my heart
I know that you are worth all that pain and sacrifice.
After all, the tears have become a part of my life
and I believe that they are slowly washing away my flaws so that I would become perfect,
not perfect in its truest sense, but perfect --- for YOU!
I wonder if you've gone through so much pain as well.
I wonder if you've been hurt so many times along the journey.
But my dearest one, please don't ever give up
because I am right here... patiently waiting for you!
I assure you that when we finally find each other
I would slowly heal those wounds by my love.
At night, I would look out my window
and stare at the beautiful sky,
hoping that somehow you are also looking up and wondering about me.
I utter a silent prayer and send all my cries to the heavens above
thinking that in time they would reach you.
And when I feel impatient, I just close my eyes
and believe that you are on your way
and that you are longing to see me as well.
It is funny but when I finally fall asleep,
it is still you that I think of,
for you are always in my dreams.
It seems that, for now,
that is the only place where I can hold on to you,
long enough to tell you how much I love you.
In my dreams you would kiss away my fears
and wrap me with your arms of love.
And this, all the more, makes me want to wake up
and face the new day ahead with the hope
that soon enough, you will no longer be a dream
but a reality and once again I am assured that you are worth the wait.
And when that time comes, everything will fall into its place,
just as I had imagined,
just as I had thought and dreamed,
just as I had believed it would be!
By then, I would simply look back and smile at all that I have gone through,
in spite of the pain and amidst the simple joys of life ---
and I would be very thankful because they all led me to you!
In the meantime, take care of yourself baby! :)
red
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Thanks for taking the time to dropped by at my blog.Well theres nothing much interesting here,ill just use this as my outlet and basically tell my daily activities on mah life:)
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i feel wrong
I shouldn't be feeling this way.
I feel guilty.
I feel wrong.
But I've felt this way all along.
I'm too scared to tell you,
Too scared to admit it,
But I can't get you off my mind.
I've never wanted anyone like this.
I can't stop thinking of you,
Your body,
Your smile,
Your eyes,
Oh, your eyes...
I don't know what to do.
Because I don't think I even like you.
But these urges are just so strong.
So can we get together?
Can we have some fun?
Because, God, I've wanted you,
I've wanted you for so damn long.
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Is it too late
your feelings are old,
but mine are new.
is it too late,
for me and you?
i know i told you,
we wouldnt work out.
but i guess i didnt know you.
because now,
each moment with you is better than the last.
im sorry about everything,
can we forget the past?
can we start anew?
because i think weve got something,
something, only for us two.
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always
I'm thinking about you again.
God, why am I doing this to myself?
It only brings me to tears.
Leaves me rubbing my eyes,
And wondering why,
Why we didn't last.
Was there some test I was supposed to pass?
And I didn't score high enough?
Or was being with me just that rough?
Cuz every moment with you was a blast.
And I wouldn't trade them for anything.
Well, I'll always be missing you,
Always thinking of you,
Always wondering,
Why I wasn't good enough for you.
Cuz I thought you were perfect for me.
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Finally
Whats wrong?
You seem sad."
Im glad you finally noticed.
For months ive been hiding myself.
You wouldn't know,
But im dying to have you.
I don't think youd care either.
No one else seems to.
Im not sure anyone really knows me,
So I don't know if they even like me.
But im trying not to care.
Lately, ive been without emotion,
Kinda like you've been towards me.
Lately ive been holding back tears,
Not only when im alone,
Its constantly.
Ill turn away or even laugh,
When im about to break down.
I don't know whats going on anymore.
And I don't feel like living.
But shh...don't tell,
I wouldn't want anyone worrying.
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when i miss you
When a girl misses u, she's afraid to see how your new girl looks, she's dreading the fact that ur not hers any more
When u break a girls heart, she still feels it when bumping heads 3 years later
When a girl just stares deep into your eyes, she's HOPING that your hers and only hers ( it shows how much she cares: eyes never lie)
When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her mind.
When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.
When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a girl answers, "I'm fine, " after a few seconds,
she is not at all fine.
When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are so wonderful.
When a girl lays her head on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
When a girl calls you everyday,
she is seeking for your attention.
When a girl wants to see you everyday,
she wants to be pampered.
When a girl says, "I'll love you forever, "
she means it.
When a girl says that she can't live without you,
she has made up her mind that you are her future.
When a girl says, "I miss you, "
no one in this world can miss you more than that
Guy Facts:
When a guy calls u
he wants to be with you
When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you...
When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong
When a guy says, "I'm fine, " after a few minutes,
he means it
When a guy stares at you,
he wishes you would care about him and wonders if you do?
When you're laying your head on a guy's chest
he has the world
When a guy calls you everyday
he is in love
When a (good) guy say he loves you
he means it
When a guy says he can't live without you
he's with you till your done
When a guy says, "I miss you, "
he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else
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moving on from my love
I wish I could have seen our futureBut I guess I caused so much burdenTime will soon move on and memories of you will dissapearAnd I’ll learn to smile againI won’t fear standing alone on that empty roadMaybe I’ll find someone to love anewThis past year I can only see it in the pastNow I’m passing by the fast laneNever looking back, but the memories will slowly fadeAnd my eyes dry from the tears I’ve criedFor so long I will try to move onEverything I’ve lost, is now to regainAnd I know it was our last good-bye
are you a meantime girl?
October 17, 2007
are you the one whom he calls when he is bored? because you make him laugh. are you the one whom he calls when he is feeling down? because you are willing to lend an ear and be a friend? are you the one with whom he spends time with between girlfriends, before he finds the one? the one whom he keeps around for the meantime? he doesn't have to wine and dine you because you already know him and he doesn't have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve.
and although you would never say it, it hurts you to know that despite all your good points and all the fun you two have, he doesn't think that you're good enough to spend any real time with. sure, it's mostly your fault, because you don't have to give in to his needs. you can play hard-to-get like the rest of them do. but you both know that you probably won't be able to pull it off. maybe you're too short, or a little overweight. whatever the reason, somehow life has given you a lot of really great qualities but left out the ones that men want in a woman. so you remain the forever friend, the steadfast companion, the secret lover…while he goes on searching for his goddess who will somehow be everything he ever wanted in a woman.
you don't captivate him with your beauty. mainly, you blend in with the crowd. you don't want to be the center of attention and you don't turn the heads of everyone in a room. but you want to turn someone's head. you know that you want to be special to someone too.
you have feelings. you have a heart. in fact, you probably have a bigger heart than any woman he has ever known because you have the front row seat to The Mess That Is His Life and you still like him anyway. you obviously see something worthwhile and redeeming in him because although he has given you nothing, and there's absolutely no reason for you to still be around…you are still there for him.
this post isn't only for the meantime girls out there. i'm pretty sure that there are some whom we may call meantime guys. i guess that at some point in our lives, some of us have been that kind of person to someone. it's not easy, you will get your heart broken little by little, over and over again. but still, you keep on going, hoping that one of these days, that person will see you in a different light. but what if that time never comes? would you settle for being that person who is just there…for the meantime?
I never knew until that moment how bad it could hurt to lose something you never really had.
July 18, 2007
I live everyday, with a broken heart. Not because I need you, but I always wanted you in my life. I always believed that I had time to make my mistakes right. But that was not the facts. I hope one day you will forgive me, for the hurt I caused. You were the the right person, at the wrong time. If you ever take the time to think back, I did what I did for a reason. Can't give you all the details, but I did push you away. There was always a method to my madness!
No games here. Everything has always been from the heart or the sleeve, which way you would like to view it.
You were the one, I truly believed in you. I let down my guard, because I trusted you with my heart. I let you down, I known, and you reciprocated not the way I hoped. Wish you the best to you and yours.
I love you, know that always.
Time to let you go……
You know what? baby ,I thought it would be easier now that you're gone, but it's not. It seems to be making everything harder and I don't get that as I lived a lot of years alone before I knew you. I feel incomplete, off kilter, etc. Who knew something so bad could be so good for me. I think I made a mistake in letting you go but we can't turn back. I just have a find a way to move forward alone.
this is really crazy,well guess i must be really crazy,coz i never really expected to fall so deep for you,but it happend and i did! i hate this feeling,i hate having feelings for you,i hate hearing the sound of voice that ive been missing all along,longing to hear it,i hate it when my phone rings and found it was not you calling,i hate checking my emails everyday just to be disappointed not seeing any emails from you everyday..i feel like im going out of my mind everyday.dunno how long should i wear this mask,it is really so hard to pretend that im happy and tottally moved on from what happened.But everytime i try to forget about you and not think of you,damn..baby i always go back to first step again….why it should be this way?why cant i forget about you?guess because of that one chance that i slip away just like that,of not seeing you in person,saying how sorry i am for hurting you,for lieing,for loving you,and for all the crazy things that ive done.
Maybe your ryt ,baby. I am really coward and this is really where am good at ,to hide at my friends and chat online with strangers and make them fall for me and lie.But i never did that to anyone,your accussing me of something that im not used to in doing.Yeah i know,i fooled you,but the story ends to you,see baby,if i am really that bad i should have not admit it to you,i should have demand allot of material things to you,but I NEVER DID!!! i was just asking for another chance,im not trying to be a intruder to your relationship with your new girl now,though it hurts me,im happy for you,no matter how my friends tried to convince me to forget all about you coz of all the bad things youve called me.I still feel the same way.
Gosh!!!! i hate this,i hate myself,maybe because im just too afraid if ever you wouldnt like me,that you wouldnt feel the same way.I was too afraid of everything and im not ready for anything,for any commitment,i dont like being confronted specially by you.I always got my tongue tied up whenever im talking to you,guess i dont want to be near beside you,coz if i do ill just be submissive and weak…i hate that.!!! i dont want to be weak,i want to be strong,i dont want to be under your power or any mans power!!! but….with you now…i feel like i want to take back those words again….coz you changed me.I just hope in time youll forgive me and maybe talk to me..lol!..i dont know if ever youll have a chance to read this blog…maybe if you research again about me..lol! but if ever..you know who you are—-rainbaby
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